Olive or Twist is the seventh episode of the eighth season of Wings, and the 155th episode overall in the series.
Synopsis[]
In the airport terminal, Antonio reads the newspaper seated at a table with Fay and Roy. Antonio shares that the Society for Intersolar System Teamwork (or S.I.S.T.) predicts that extraterrestrial alien visitation will occur on Nantucket on the 18th of this month. Although Antonio is very dismissive, Fay shares her believe that humans can't be alone in the universe. Antonio more emphatically derides the idea of alien as "woo-woo, hocus pocus stuff" before leaving for his standing Wednesday appointment with Madame Zola to have her read the bumps on his head. Fay braces herself for Roy's input, but is pleasantly surprised that he also believes in extraterrestrial life. The pair share a moment bonding over reading the same books and Roy shares that he has a mole in S.I.S.T. that may be able to get them invited to the alien visitation on the 18th.
In Joe's office, Brian is sitting at the desk when Casey enters lamenting her inability to find a job. Instead of sympathizing with Casey, Brian shares that his insurance check for the fire that destroyed his house just came in. Joe and Helen suddenly enter excitedly (and forcefully) ready to find Brian a new house so he can move out of their place.
After looking at three different houses, Brian, Helen, and Joe stop at Les's Diner for lunch. As the trio sits at a table, Casey burst in complaining that they left her at the last house. Brian contemplaints buying a new house and when he picks one, Joe and Helen run off to contact the realtor. Brian and Casey try to order a meal and are informed by the restaurateur that he's closing tomorrow and moving to Miami. As Brian talks himself into his decision, Casey admires the diner and suggest that Brian purchase the location and turn it into a upscale martini bar. With some convincing, she finally wins Brian over and he decides to open a martini bar instead of buy a home (much to the consternation of Joe and Helen).
Days later, Joe and Helen enter the diner/bar midway through renovation complaining about Brian and Casey continuing to live with them. Brian and Casey come in from the kitchen area and ask for their opinion of the place and Joe lies saying he loves it. As Brian goes out to check on his car, Casey asks Joe and Helen if they'll help with the martini menu. Excited at the prospect of just drinking at the bar, they accept. Fay and Antonio next enter with Fay reminiscing about the diner and Antonio speculating about the club being too snobby. When Brian reenters, Antonio begs to be his doorman and Brian accepts. As they head into the back, Roy enters with news for Fay, he's heard from S.I.S.T. that the aliens will be landing on Sconset Point in three nights.
Later that day, Joe and Helen drunkenly come up with martini names at the bar surrounded by empty martini glasses and bottles. Helen asks how they'll get home and Joe says Antonio can drive them because he's sober and thinking clearly. Meanwhile, Antonio is at the front door role playing being a doorman for an exclusive club.
Two days later, a crowd is lined up outside Brian's for the grand opening. Excited and nervous, Brian ask Antonio to let in the first customer. Albie walks in and immediately slips on the floor, landing flat on his back, and badly injuring himself. Les suggests they call a doctor, and Brian suggests they call their insurance company, but Casey informs him they don't have one.
Later that night, Brian melancholically plays "Call Me Irresponsible" on the piano before yelling a Casey for not getting insurance. Casey suggests they visit Albie in the morning and try to smooth things over.
The next morning, Casey and Brian arrive at Albie's home and find him lying in bed reading Mad Magazine. Seeming to misunderstand, Albie assumes they are mad at him and apologizes for causing such a scene at the club. In between yelling with his mother, Albie explains that the doctor said he broke his "hinny". Brian, seeing how immature Albie is, suggests Casey sleep with him to make this whole thing go away. Bright lights briefly flash outside, and Albie's mother (yelling from downstairs) ask if it was a spaceship. Undeterred, Casey tells Albie that they would like to pay his medical bills and give him a lifetime pass to Brian's if he signs a liability waiver. Albie agrees to sign anything as long as his mother looks at it first.
Some time later, Casey and Brian wait outside Brian's (renamed Albie's) talking about how successful the bar was. They try to wave down Albie to get in, but he says they won't be able to enter because they are too busy tonight.
As the credits roll, Roy and Fay enter acting strange and confirming the plan that they won't tell anyone about their extraterrestrial encounter. As they turn, they reveal that one side of each of their faces is bright red.
Credits[]
Main Cast[]
- Tim Daly as Joe Hackett
- Steven Weber as Brian Hackett
- Crystal Bernard as Helen Hackett
- David Schramm as Roy Biggins
- Rebecca Schull as Fay Cochran
- Tony Shalhoub as Antonio Scarpacci
- Amy Yasbeck as Casey Davenport
Guest Cast[]
- John P. Connolly as Les
- Stuttering John Melendez as Albert "Albie" Morehead
- Miles Arreola as Casey's Hunky Assistant Manager
- Diana Bellamy as Voice of Albie's Mother/Mrs. Morehead
Quotes[]
- Antonio Scarpacci - "What a bunch of nutbags."
Fay Cochran - "I don't know about that Antonio. I mean, who's to say that we're the only intelligent life in the universe?"
Antonio Scarpacci - "Me! I say it. We're it baby. That's all she wrote. You're wasting your time with all this woo-woo, hocus pocus stuff."
Fay Cochran - "Where are you going?"
Antonio Scarpacci - "It's Wednesday. I have a standing appointment with Madame Zola to read the bumps on my head."
- Brian Hackett - "Hey! How'd the job interview go?"
Casey Davenport - "Oh, another bust. This week alone I've been turned down for tour guide at the Whaling Museum, dental receptionist, and chum dumper on a tuna boat."
- Joe Hackett - "A martini bar. A martini bar! Their going to be living with us until they die."
[Joe and Helen exchange a sinister look]
Helen Hackett - "Let's not go there yet."
- Brian Hackett "So what do you think?"
Joe Hackett - "Do you want the truth or a bald-faced lie?"
Brian Hackett - "I'm in deep, give me the lie."
Joe Hackett - "I love it!"
- Casey Davenport - "I still can't believe it. Packed every night"
Brian Hackett - "We were right. This place is a money machine. Albie! Albie, over here!"
Casey Davenport - "Please Albie!"
Albie Morehead - "Sorry kids. Not tonight."
Trivia[]
- The title of this episode is a play on Oliver Twist, the 1830s classic novel by Charles Dickens.
- The books that Fay and Roy have read about extraterrestrial life include: Aliens in My Pocket, Red Planet, Blue Skin, and Bright Lights, Big Heads.
- Joe and Helen come up with three different martini names including:
- Martini Navratilova - named after Martina Navratilova, the Czechoslovakian-American tennis player.
- Idi Amini Martini - named after Idi Amin Dada Oumee, the Ugandan president from 1971 to 1979.
- Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polkadot Martini - a reference to "Itsy Bitsy Teenie Weenie Yellow Polkadot Bikini", a novelty song from the 1950s popularized by Brian Hyland in 1960.
- This episode is currently unavailable for streaming in the United States likely due to the music rights for "Call Me Irresponsible", which Brian plays on the piano.
