The Houseguest

The Houseguest
Carlton and Helen at his 70th birthday
Episode	Season 4, Episode 19
Summary	When Carlton Blanchard falls down the steps at Helen's house, she invites him to stay with her until his ankle heals to avoid a lawsuit.
Air Date	April 8, 1993
Writer	Bill Diamond and Michael Saltzman
Director	Andy Ackerman
Previous	The Key to Alex
Next	Goodbye, Old Friend

The Houseguest is the nineteenth episode of the fourth season on Wings, and the 69th episode overall in the series.

Synopsis

When Carlton Blanchard's son doesn't come to Nantucket for his 70th birthday, Helen throws him an impromptu surprise birthday party at her house. But when Carlton falls down her stairs and threatens a lawsuit from his lawyer son, Helen's hospitality is stretched to the limit as he stays in her living room while he recovers. After over a week, Helen is furious and kicks Calton out when she learns two facts: Carlton doesn't have any children and he faked his injuries.

Credits

Main Cast

• Tim Daly as Joe Hackett
• Steven Weber as Brian Hackett
• Crystal Bernard as Helen Chapel
• Thomas Haden Church as Lowell Mather
• David Schramm as Roy Biggins
• Rebecca Schull as Fay Cochran
• Tony Shalhoub as Antonio Scarpacci

Guest Cast

• William Hickey as Carlton Blanchard
• Trish Monaco as Aeromass Gal (uncredited)

Quotes

• Carlton Blanchard - "Can I ask you a question? For Pete's sake, for the love of Mike, heavens to Betsy...Who are all these people?!"

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• Carlton Blanchard - "That brings up an interesting question. If you have a nightmare during the day, what do you call it?"
  Joe Hackett - "I'll let you know as soon as this one's over."

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• Helen Chapel - "I told you I don't know."
  Carlton Blanchard - "Well, think about it. If it's neither here nor there then where the hell is it?"

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• Carlton Blanchard - "Say, Angelo...Do you know the song "That's Amore"?"
  Antonio Scarpacci - "Yes."
  Carlton Blanchard - "Well, if the moon hits your eye like a big pizza pie how do you think a doorknob would feel?"
  Antonio Scarpacci - "I don't know."
  Carlton Blanchard - "Well, try this: if we were derived from the kangaroo instead of the monkey would we still need pockets in our pants?"
  Antonio Scarpacci - "I don't know."
  Carlton Blanchard - "Well, here's another: can a man catch a fungal infection just by touching a man on his foot?"

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• Carlton Blanchard - "You see, I kind of exaggerated about my son."
  Helen Chapel - "Oh, he's not a lawyer, is he?"
  Carlton Blanchard - "I don't have a son."
  Helen Chapel - "What?"
  Carlton Blanchard - "I don't have any children...That I know of."

Trivia

• This is episode marks the second appearance of Carlton Blanchard. He previously appeared in Das Plane.
• The scenes of the plane flying at night are of the Cessna N121PB not the Cessna N121PP.
• Carlton lies about having a son named "Carlton Jr."
• The address of Helen's house is revealed as 612 Elm, but Lowell confuses it for 614 Elm.
• Carlton has 8 pet cats.
• When asking for Antonio to stay with Carlton while she runs errands, Helen mentions that she married Antonio so he could stay in the country. The was seen in Marriage, Italian Style and Divorce, American Style.